The Surgery

            It’s called a gonadectomy. I had to go to Ann Arbor for the surgery, because they are some of the best in the area. They told me I was going to be able to go home that very same day. I was scared. And nervous. But mostly scared. I remember I had a FEAST the night before, because I had to fast starting at midnight. We arrived at the hospital that morning, and I made sure I had my favorite teddy bear with me. His name is Grandpa bear. My Grandpa gave him to me when I was just a little kid, sick in the hospital with pneumonia. I still snuggle with him all the time. But now its because my Grandpa is no longer alive, and I miss him dearly. But anyway, I don’t remember much of that day. But I do remember them wheeling me to the operating room, toasty warm in those amazing heated blankets, holding my little teddy bear. I remember them putting the mask on me that was going to make me fall asleep. It was extremely crazy, because of what I saw when I was going under. I remember seeing all the doctors and nurses around me, and seeing their faces. The next thing I know everything started spinning, and it was just their heads that were spinning around a black and white pinwheel. Crazy huh.

            The next thing I know, I’m starting to wake up, back in the recovery room. I struggled trying to stay awake, so I slept on and off for most of the day. Eventually they got me to stay awake, and after a while they released me. I remember being confused, because they told me they were going to be making small incisions on my belly, below the underwear line. I lifted up my shirt, and I had 3 incisions right in the middle of my stomach. I had 2 that were more on the sides, and a bigger one right along the bottom ridge of my belly button. You can’t really see the 2 small ones anymore, but the one on my belly button is still really visible.  It took a long time to heal. The cuts they made healed up fairly fast, but because they cut through all my muscle to get to my insides, it took a while for the pain to go away in my abs. That summer was rough, because I couldn’t participate in softball like I did every summer since I can remember. I remember trying to pitch one day with my dad. I was able to throw 3 pitches, and then I fell to the ground clutching my tummy, because I was in so much pain. That was about 2 months after the surgery.

            With the surgery, they had to make the 3 incisions to take out the gonads successfully. The 2 on the sides were where they put the tubes that put gas in my tummy, so my belly would get big, and they could move around easily with the laparoscope. The laparoscope went through the incision on my belly button. That is where the pulled the gonads out. They did a biopsy on it, and I think that said it was not malignant. But obviously it would have taken a while for it to develop into cancer. They told me I was going to have to go on a hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I would have to take estrogen supplements for the rest of my life. And believe me, they are not the most pleasant things to take!